Articles

Videogamers Against Mothers Against Videogame Addiction and Violence

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In my daily effort to find affiliates for this site, I stumbled upon Mothers Against Videogame Addiction and Violence. It was just ridiculous enough that I decided I should spend a little time reviewing the site. Maybe one day they’ll post a review of videolamer and tell the world how evil we are. Not because we are important, mind you, but because they think everything is evil.

MAVAVAVAVAV
MAVAV just rolls off the tongue.

The MAVAV site opens with a hyperbole about how video game addiction and violence are the fastest growing threats to children’s health and way of life. But before they went on about how video games are a problem rivaling drugs and alcohol abuse, I noticed their logo is a Play Station controller with a red line through it. →  Read the rest

You never forget your first one

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PSO Ver 1 case
The future is colorful.

I really enjoyed Phantasy Star Online (PSO). I was there when it launched on the DreamCast. I was there for the DreamCast launch as well, but that’s a different story. There was just “something” about PSO that grabbed me. I’m not sure if it was the lineage of the earlier games, the sci-fi rpg trappings, or the Diablo II elements. Knowing me, it was a combination of all three.

I got hooked when I started playing the online component of the game. Initially, I was dialing in using the DreamCast’s integrated modem. When I first started playing, it was fine. Then I wanted a bit more.

After savagely beating a roommate for picking up the phone during a run of Caves-2, I ordered an ethernet adapter. I could play without any interruptions. →  Read the rest

Learning from Japanese Synergy

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Synergy is not a word to be recklessly tossed about. It is a seriously proactive relationship between outside of the box marketing and paradigm shifting branding that can result in untold of revenue for your company. The video game market has created new opportunities for the realignment of business models in this post category killer Ted spread. Tracing this synergy to its roots leads us across the Pacific.

The Japanese consumer will buy anything. Despite saving more than Americans, the Japanese are extremely hardcore in their loyalty. People who follow an anime will buy any worthless product tie in, people who like school girls will spend money on used school girl underwear, and people who like a game series will buy food and drinks as long as it has the series logo on it. →  Read the rest

Origins of a pinball fiend

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Capcom’s happiest test arcade.

When I was younger, (which is more than a decade ago, but not long enough to be the “good old days”) my father would bring me to La Jolla Village Square. In that shopping mall was a place called Yellow Brick Road, which was a Capcom test arcade. There, I would meet with friends and unofficially compete against other groups of players to see who could “hold” the Street Fighter II machines.

These were not mere quarter munchers. These were gladitorial arenas, forty-five inch wide screens, with seats for the competitors, meticulously maintained controls, and a constantly changing roster of challengers.

One mantra. “Winner stays, loser pays.”

While I was establishing my fighting game “street cred,” my father would sometimes stay for a few games, but not anything so forward, down, down-forward, punch. →  Read the rest

Fevered Dreams of Video Games

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the ultimate lasers…

…black and white… all rotating, is one superior? lasers everywhere…

white and black two way… four options but with homing blast, but which is the most true?

This is a rough transcript of my thoughts during a recent fever induced delirium. They may not make much sense to you, but I had pictures going along with the words in my head. Also, they didn’t really make sense to me. All I know is that when I’m very sick, I dream about shooters. This specific half asleep half awake episode seemed to be both comparing the minimalism of Ikaruga to the chock full of weapons Gradius V. I also thought I had come up with the perfect laser approach in all games. This makes no sense, of course.

Since this illness has kept me away from the site for almost a week it makes sense that I’d have writing on my mind. →  Read the rest

Untapped Talent

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First a confession. Last night I watched Project Runway. Girlfriends often force you into doing things you wouldn’t normally do (like shower) and this was no exception. I don’t like fashion and it doesn’t like me so we stay 50 yards apart at all times. I could go on and on about the lush tapestries and… nevermind, I’ve already run out of words to describe fashion, but I do have a point in all of this. A designer was dismissed because he didn’t do a great job sewing the garment he designed.

Who cares if he can’t sew, if his designs are good then he will have a team or sewers, or better yet, a sweat shop. To penalize and dismiss him from the field for something as trivial as sewing ability is to only deprive the fashion world of his talent. →  Read the rest

Capitalism in the video game market

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Uh huh huh
MTV’s sole contribution to the arts.

Recently I read a letter to a magazine that said a games quality can be determined by how well it sells. If we are to accept the generally accepted American view of capitalism, this should be true. But then why do terrible pop artists always dominate the charts, why does MTV exist, and why has no one murdered Bill O’Reilly? Clearly, there is some sort of flaw in the system.

While it would be fun to give a socialist lecture, I will stick to the video game market today. Why do good games not always sell? The first obvious reason is that games are expensive so the consumer cannot try all of them. A cheap product, like a pen or mayonnaise, can easily be purchased by most segments of society.

 →  Read the rest

SOS from Japan!

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The following is an email I received yesterday in my shiny new lamer mailbox.

In the beginning, I am sorry to write suddenly long sentences.
As victims’ representative of it, I dare to write that here.
… to inform lots of people all over the world about that …

The consumption cultures of Japan are facing a serious crisis by The PSE Standardization (Electrical Appliances And Materials Safety Law) now to
prevent the ignition accidents of consumer electronics, it is enacted.
Though RoHS looks like this, there are large problems in ruining the
Japanese economy!

Buying and selling consumer electronics with built-in power supplies
which were made before the year 2001 (3DO・PC-FX・Sega Saturn・Dream Cast・Play Station 1000-9000・Neo-Geo CD etc. correspond in the game machines) will be impossible by this law in April 2006!

 →  Read the rest

Gold Farmers: Destroying the Fun (and economy) of MMORPG’s

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If you have not read Billy’s take on gold farmers, you may want to now.

Anyone who plays World of Warcraft knows them: they often have strange names (Ihugirls, Jobsister), but they may also have a name unnoticeable from others. Their guild tag might be your average WoW lore fluff, or it could be something along the lines of “Knightsofthepiratekitty.” They play as much, if not more, as any hardcore addict: 8-12 hour days. But rather than roaming about the game’s many dungeons and zones, you find them in them alternating between the auction house and the same hot spots: Winterspring hunting herbs, camping elites in Tyr’s Hand, or patrolling Burning Steppes for rich thorium veins. Every hour of the day.

Who are they? Gold farmers. Somewhere along the line, people figured out that there was in fact more money to be made in the secondary market of MMORPG’s (selling gold, items, and characters) than their was in the primary market (selling subscriptions). →  Read the rest

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Girlfriend of a gamer

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Game Rush
Game Rush may be in Blockbuster, but only in the way the Confederacy is "in" the Union.

Do you or does someone you know have a partner who is a gamer? Well I imagine if you are reading this uber nerdy site that you do or you are one. For many gamers, gaming is not just a habit but a way of life. Gamers eat, sleep and breath video gaaaaaames. I learned this lesson the hard way when I fell in love with a fan boy. Being in a relationship with a gamer is not easy. There are the long hours spent waiting while your gamer guy/gal looks through piles of used games hoping to find that hidden gem, or the times when your partner totally ignores you because they are completely immersed in a game. →  Read the rest

Games as Art I

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Munch
Art

I obviously cannot possibly settle the debate on what art is, but I believe video games are art. To me, it comes down to how much of something is alterable and how much is set. For example, a dish washer basically has to be pretty similar to most other dish washers; besides some of the visual design and new technology now and then, a dish washer is a dish washer. I would not consider dish washers to be art. The same goes for most objects, like pens, staplers, monitors, tires, shoe horns, etc. More room for variation in design, however, leads to a more artistic thing. A car, for example, has specific visual properties, as well as spatial and internal layout amongst other variables. A car is much closer to art in my approximation than a tube of toothpaste. →  Read the rest

A call for womanly arms

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Any group put together by a company, whether it be New Kids on the Block or the Frag Dolls, should be highly respected.

Despite the Microsoft announcement at last E3 that women were going to be brought into the fold and the introduction of higher fines for scantily clad booth babes, women are still on the fringes of gaming. Slowly we approach equality, moving through the same motions as any fight for equality in any area.

First, there are the radical few. Small groups of women band together, screaming out that they are better than the boys. Thus the Frag Dolls and other such groups are born.

Next, comes the insistence that women are different and need games catered to them. Thus Barbie gaming is born. Barbie Fashion Designer actually outsold Mortal Kombat back in 1996 and broke every previous CD ROM sale record. →  Read the rest

The Ethics of Farming part II

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Continued from yesterday’s part I…

  • If you buy gold, you support Chinese sweatshops.

You’d think people on computers made in Chinese sweatshops would catch the irony of their argument. They don’t though, know why? It’s because they don’t want Chinese people on their servers period. It isn’t about keeping the game servers clean of trouble, it’s about keeping out people who don’t speak English or live in a country they like. Here is the truth though. There are no gold farming Chinese sweat shops. I have spoken to gold farmers in person and in the game. I was curious about the way they operate so I am always asking questions. Here’s what I have learned. There are no sweatshops; the majority of the gold farmers are college students. They usually operate three or four in a company and alternate between classes and so on and so forth. →  Read the rest

The Ethics of Farming part I

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As someone who once used to rent the old school NES “cheats” videos (it’s how I learned to beat Castlevainia 2) I am not sure if I am the right person to talk about what is ethical in the gaming world. I will anyway though, so take that!

Anyone who has ever made it beyond level 10 in World of Warcraft knows that there are people in places usually not the US that grind away all day in game collecting items and gold (in game currency) to sell for real world currency. Big deal, right? Well here is what I think… No, it isn’t a big deal. Blizzard, in one of their more incandescent moments, decided to combat this by making the best in game items BOP, which means Bind on Pickup. →  Read the rest

Diablo Musings

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For the most part Diablo fans figured the series was dead, considering that the talent behind it had left for greener pastures.

Then BAM!

A Diablo 3?

Which is interesting, considering that Diablo wasn’t made by the standard Blizzard department that created Starcraft or Warcraft. In fact it was made by a separate Blizzard office, Blizzard North. Originally named Condor, Blizzard bought them out and renamed them to Blizzard North in 96, even though they had been contracted to start building Diablo a year earlier.

The three head honchos left Blizzard North due to strife with the parent company Vivendi over financial crap, typical corporate dicks screwing with the artists kind of thing. So they split and formed a new company which put out Guild Wars.

But it looks like Blizzard is going to do a Diablo 3 after all. →  Read the rest

Idol Worship: Bo and Ippo

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An extension of the Best Game Ever column, this new space allows me to not just love and gush over my favorite games, but caress and manhandle some of the people who made my favorite games. An obvious first choice would be someone like Shigeru Miyamoto, Yuji Naka, Sid Meier, or Will Wright, but that wouldn’t be very exciting and where’s the elitism and snobbery in picking someone everyone already knows? Their days may still yet come in the pages of Idol Worship, but for now we will examine two little known composers who worked for Sega in their golden age, Tokuhiko Uwabo and Izuho Takeuchi, better known as Bo and Ippo (well, to me at least).

Sega, like Atari, refused to give credit to their staff well into the 90’s. →  Read the rest

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Dear Brady Fiechter

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I can’t figure out why women characters are so shallow. Incidentally, here is our newest issue.

Dear Brady Fiechter,

In the January issue of Play magazine, you penned an article titled “A simple request, really…” In this wish of resolutions for the gaming industry, you called for female characters to receive “breast reductions” and character to be “written into our characters.” I share your hopes, but I do not go about the matter in the same way.

I employ more than your magazines current zero women, for example. I do not work for an editor who is portrayed as having women draped all over him with a smirk on his face, nor does my editor write reviews in which he names “breathtaking female lead,” or “ultra-hot leading lady” as one of only a few positive points. →  Read the rest

Bad Design 2

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Last time I wrote one of these I said this entry would look at design flaws from Gladius, Second Sight and Kingdom Hearts. I hate to let down the droves of Second Sight fans, but this will have to wait until the third entry. Today I’ll be following in the strong tradition of the first article by covering a PC game, a console game and an older game. Also like last time, all are good or excellent games I highly respect. Now on to why they suck.
I want to be the Gentle Tom Boy, but it’s not on the list yet.

Tales of Symphonia: Excess Complications – I am a big fan of complex games. The more features and stats, the more I like a game, but even my madness has limitations. →  Read the rest

For absolutely no reason, here is Golden Axe

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Axe Machine
Why yes, that is a Van Gogh to the right of the machine. Thanks for noticing.

I learned how to ride a bike at 13, so it should be no surprise that it’s 2006 and I have now had my first experience with a digital camera. At this rate, I’ll kiss a girl by the early 2060s. Sadly, I do not own the camera, it belongs to my girlfriend (I know, that could easily ruin the last joke, but luckily for us, and Jesus, we believe in no touch love) but that hasn’t stopped me from taking as many stupid pictures as possible. The first pictures I took were of my video game collection, my crotch (soon to be featured on this site), and then my Golden Axe machine.

Having an arcade machine in a small apartment sounds like a great idea, but is it really? →  Read the rest

Atheists case made for them

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50 Cent’s new game Bulletproof has sold over a million copies. I have not played the game, but despite this I will say it is bad. I wasted hours of my life watching Battlefield Earth just to be “objective” and guess what, everyone else was right. Bulletproof has bad to terrible reviews so I’m running with the idea that it sucks.

So what does this tell us about the industry, and if I can editorialize wildly and blow things hugely out of proportion, life itself? It says that image is not just 100% of what people look for because that implies a neutral stance towards knowledge. It implies people go out of their way to ignore reality, fight to maintain ignorance and probably should not be given the right to vote for their leaders. →  Read the rest