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School of Shmups – Intro

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A few blog posts ago, I asked people if they would like an article series devoted to the shoot ’em up genre. The response was solid, and so I begin the endeavor with this introductory article, in which we lay out the rules for our fun. I will also be making sure to link to these rules at the start of each new column, so those who actually try and read won’t accuse me of things I already stated.

Thankfully, the rules are simple. Each article will begin with some basic information about when and where the shmup came from, followed by the best ways to try to play it. After that, we take a look at how the game fits into the genre. →  Rayman Reading Rabbids

Breaking news – Wii sales decent, PS3 the greatest

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Edit 1.26.08: This first interview is likely fake. The odds of a new blog getting first Robbie Bach and then Ken Kutaragi interviews one after another seem infinitesimal. If this is the case, don’t I feel like an ass.

In an interview that shocked the gaming world, Microsoft’s Robbie Bach announced that the Wii is in fact selling. This contradicts earlier reports that the console was an abysmal failure and moved only 14 units this past holiday season.

From Bach:

“At Microsoft we think of the Wii in a different bracket of gaming so its hard to compare the two consoles. The Wii has a very small life cycle and doesn’t compare to the Xbox 360 feature wise. And while it is taking plausible 360 sales its important to notice that Nintendo has created a revolutionary device and Microsoft expected it to sell decent, and the system can afford to sell decent because its very similar to a childs toy. →  Read like G did.

A Passage to games as art

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If you have not yet encountered Passage, don’t google it. Don’t go read reviews, don’t even read the comments to this post.
It only takes 5 minutes to play the game, and you would have spent that long reading. So just play it, and remember that you can explore up and down as well as left to right.

Here’s the Windows version
and the Mac version
and Unix source (SDL libraries required)

Try to beat my high score…1563

Then – and only then – read the creator’s statement, and play it again.

I’ll wait…

…

Congratulations, you have just experienced games as art. And now that you’ve played the game at least twice come discuss it in the comments, where I have left a more detailed and spoiler-filled reaction.

EA: Level 10 alchemists, Level 1 Tech Support Part 2

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When we last left our heroes, they were encountering fucktardery of the highest order at EA while trying to get a replacement Rock Band guitar. After muddling his way through their horrible tech support, my roommate managed to talk to a real human being who was able to fix the problem. Days later, a new guitar showed up. Even better, there was no accountability attached to the guitar to indicate we needed to return the foot pedal they had mistakenly sent. Gleeful, we were in the process of trying to figure out how to scam EA. Our thought was that we might install the new foot pedal and attempt to return the old one for a SECOND new foot pedal. This would arm us with a spare in the event of a foot pedal malfunction. →  Virtua Poster 4: Evolution

Gaming on the L train

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I like to look cool. Obviously I’m not alone in this, but living in New York and taking the much-derided (for its “hipness”) L train makes this a more pressing issue for me than most. Many of our dear readers no doubt plop into their clunky cars, polluted with fast food wrappers and other etc’s, and drive to and from work more or less anonymously. I, on the other hand get jabbed with stares by confidence-sapping girls who are far too pretty, rich, and successful to ever want to talk to me for more than an instant. Still, I like to pretend.

So when I received my shiny-black Nintendo DS for Xmas, my thoughts quickly turned to “how cool am I going to look using this on the subway?” →  U R Not lamE.

Bionic Commando – can Capcom do no wrong?

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I have said it in the past, but they keep proving it right time after time – Capcom was one of the most exciting developers of last generation, and they look to be the undisputed king of the industry in this new one. Let us just look at some of the games they have blessed us with:

– Okami is getting a second life on the Wii.
– Street Fighter 4 gives us the sequel so many wanted, and the SF2 HD Remix team has done an incredible job of keeping the community involved and informed, to make sure we get what we want.
– After initial uncertainty, they decided to bless us with the entirety of Phoenix Wright.
– Devil May Cry 4 on two platforms. →  Read Band 2

Article idea – shmups anyone?

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You may or may not have noticed, but over the last three months or so I have found my articles and blogs to be increasingly cranky. I have been hoping to get away from this attitude in order to bring more insight and entertainment, and I have the perfect solution. My biggest problem has been an attempt to comment on and tackle every big issue in gaming, especially when my views don’t coincide with the rest of the fandom. Simply put, you cannot change the world, and with the way internet fandom works, it seems an especially useless tasks. So while I won’t stop looking at the important issues, perhaps the best form of anger management is to find a happy place. →  Readius III and IV

All you ever need to know about Japan

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After spending 10 nights in Japan I am now qualified to make sweeping statements about the Japanese culture. The following are immutable truths (told in a convenient pros and cons style) about this wonderful and bizarre country:

Pro
Suntory Boss is the boss of them all since 1992.

There’s no use denying it.

Con
Japanese people seem as pro-Japan as Americans are pro-America. I was asked by one of my gracious host’s fathers why we came to Japan. He was an awesome guy but really pushed hard for an answer he found satisfactory. I think the question was probably just mistranslated and he actually asked, “How awesome is Japan?” The same day, a man on the street approached us and told us in English that “Japan is number 1.” →  Read it your way.

Street Fighter 4 Backlash

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Capcom is taking the usual approach when it comes to hyping up Street Fighter 4. They slowly release videos and screenshots, while allowing all sorts of previews and interviews to try and assure fans that they know what they are doing.

Of course, in this day and age such a method of hype is the wrong way. I have not done much to check out how the hardcore fighting game community feels about SF4, but among mainstream gamers and the non fighter “hardcore” crowd, the reactions are less than stellar. Bad words are flying about the stages, the new character, the way the fighting itself seems to work. It all seems baffling considering the game is still in an incredibly early stage (not even alpha yet), and the only confirmed platform is Japanese arcades (which was a guarantee when the game was announced). →  Eh, I’ve got nothing better to do.

EA: Level 10 alchemists, Level 1 Tech Support

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So unfortunately, like many Rock Band players, our guitar broke about a month ago. No problem, we have Guitar Hero 3 backups, so we’ll send it off for repair. Additionally, rumor is that you get a free EA game, so sure, we’ll take free stuff. So my roommate packaged up the guitar in a box (opting to not pay for immediate gratification, which was an option), and sent it off. We waited a few weeks, nothing happened, although the repair status on the website changed, so we anticipated that some sort of witchcraft was occurring deep in the EA support labs.

And boy were we right, at least about the witchcraft. Yesterday, a small box shows up for my roommate. He wasn’t expecting any porn (or so he claimed), so he was mystified what it could be. →  Illiterates hate her! Click to read this one weird trick.