Every year, people lie to themselves about what they will accomplish. Society has enshrined these lies in the tradition called New Year’s resolutions. In this vein, some staff have compiled a belated list of games we claim we will play this year (2022 for people reading in the future and time travelers).

Jay

Choosing three games to definitely certainly probably maybe play this year was tough. With age comes wisdom and a lack of time; I am wise enough to know I missed 14 thousand important games, and have time for maybe one of them (at least if I keep playing crap like Saga Scarlet Grace). Should I catch up on SNES RPGs like Lufia 2 and Terranigma? Maybe PS1 RPGs like Chrono Cross and Xenogears? Or every Metal Gear Solid game after the first? →  Are anyone else’s nipples hard?

2022 may already be three months old, but videolamer just relaunched and we have calendar based feelings to express. Here are some of the staffs’ least undesirable games coming out this year. [Because of the enormous lead time of this site’s print version, some of these games may already be available.]

Cunzy

In the (n)ever year that was 2020-202X with most of the normal markers of the year suspended, canceled, or otherwise prevented by the pandemic, it really was only the next game release on the horizon that helped to stay shotgun from mouth. 

Top of my list, and pleasingly scheduled for the end of January (which is now the past) is (was) Pokémon Legends: Arceus. Part of the appeal of this game at the moment is it’s hard to work out the shape of the game from the handful of teasers and trailers that we’ve got. →  I’m gonna take you for a read.

I’ve been a fan of the Langrisser series for a long time. The series’ debut entry, Warsong, is the only one that received an official localization until recently. Unfortunately, the Langrisser 1&2 remake available on most platforms is not only missing much of what makes Warsong special, it’s not even a particularly good game in its own right.

There are several things included in the remake that are actually good changes. It includes a fully viewable class change chart, with “secret” final classes spelled out (much of this was hidden in the original games). The skill system is actually a great addition as well. It gives more customization options and incentivizes exploring the tree a little more. It also gives a little more flavor to characters that are otherwise very similar, like Thorne and Hawking. →  Look upon my works, ye mighty, and read!

When it comes to repairing CD’s and DVD’s, there are a number of practices and household products which people swear can make a disc good as new. I tried several of the most well known methods in my youth, and found that none of them did a damn thing. Brasso, for instance, never managed to make a scratched disc run any better. Same with toothpaste. I even tried boiling a used copy of Devil May Cry. I ended up “fixing” it by buying another copy.

Ever since these failed experiments, I wondered whether any of these methods really, truly could work.  I can report that under certain circumstances, you can fix a game by boiling it. I’m surprised and a bit baffled, but I tried it yesterday, and I can attest to the results. →  The Adventures of Cookie and Read

I know, I know, it’s February 2011, and here I am with a 2010 retrospective. The truth is that this has been written and ready a while now, but only now have I remembered to post it. Keep in mind that these are my personal favorite games of 2010. If one of your faves isn’t on here, chances are good that I simply didn’t play it.

Kirby’s Epic Yarn

I put Kirby’s Epic Yarn on this list with a few caveats. I find that the game is significantly more interesting with two players, and in my personal experience, is even better when at least one of those players isn’t particularly good at video games. That’s because Epic Yarn is so cleverly built as to be able to accomdate both kinds of players. →  Get lame or get out.

Back in the day, a passion for video games meant a healthy interest in video games as part of a normal, balanced diet. These days, anything than less than full retard could see you harshly labeled as a newbie on some internet forums. But unlike wine or film it is hard to be a connoisseur of the whole of gaming-kind. There are so many games that humans cannot tell you how many there are any more. Thousands? Certainly. Millions? Maybe. It depends. Is every slight mod a separate game? Is every two second flash game a ‘game’? Do not seek the answer to those questions young one, to seek to answer them is to look into the void. By far the best thing to do if you want to really make it in the video game sector is to hyper focus on one tiny tiny tiny bit of gaming. →  We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we play.