In this special edition lamecast Christian, Don & Casey discuss the 3DR DNF WTF OMFG BBQ situation. There are tears in here, so if that kind of stuff makes you uncomfortable maybe you should listen to something else.
Review – Freshly-Picked Tingle’s Rosy Rupeeland
Tingle is a range of stylized sexual enhancements from Durex, defined by creating a tingling sensation during coitus. The tingling sensation is derived from mint extract. It comes in two distinct forms: condoms and an water-based lube. The sexual enhancer lube has received some criticism as the tingling sensation has received negative reviews when used internally.
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You see what I did there? I made a joke. You see, I am reviewing a DS game called “Freshly-Picked Tingle’s Rosy Rupeeland” which of course features the unwelcome addition to the Zelda series, Tingle. But, and this is the crux of the joke, Durex (www.durex.com) also have a brand called “Tingle”. Oh, the hilarity.
Right, so, this “game” starts with Tingle’s journey to becoming Tingle, and his quest to get into “Rupeeland” where, and get this, women will touch him. → In all ages, hypocrites, called producers, have put crowns upon the heads of thieves, called publishers.
Review – Rise of the Argonauts
I’m not really sure what I think of Rise of the Argonauts. On one hand, the game suffers from some poor design choices that can really slow the pace to an insufferable crawl and frustrate the player immensely … so I wouldn’t recommend it. On the other hand, the exciting combat sequences, engrossing story, fine voice acting and art direction made the game quite enjoyable … so I’d totally recommend it.
On another hand, the developer calls this game an RPG, which it totally isn’t. Yeah, you can choose new abilities and change your outfits, but both aspects are so limited that you can’t really call it a full-blown RPG … so we’re back to not recommending it again (for RPG players). → Assassin’s Read
Review – Killzone 2
When I was first thinking about how to approach my review of Killzone 2’s campaign, I thought I could write up a sizable spreadsheet detailing all the cliches and tropes stolen from other games and films. Thankfully, I realized the errors of such an idea. The problem with the game wasn’t that it was using cliches and silly names. Plenty of other shooters do the same and are forgiven. No, the problem was that Killzone 2 was breaking one of my primary sins of game design – it made me feel like I was wasting my time. I began thinking not of the action at hand, but what else I could be doing during my time after work. I soldiered on simply for the purpose of review, which in turn led to my putting a magnifying glass on every little piece of creative laziness, even if it technically got the job done. → Some say the world will end in fire, some say in read more
Review – Avalon Code
Video games have made me weep for a variety reasons. Terrible voiceovers, crappy graphics, mind numbing gameplay, irritating music – if it is horrible I’ve probably suffered through it. But I’ve never experienced anything like Avalon Code before. Not for any of the above reasons – to the contrary, Avalon Code has superb presentation, surprisingly good voice acting (on a DS game, no less!), and an intriguing plot with an excellent premise. What makes me weep is that Avalon Code is a game that is so close to being one of the greatest action RPGs I’ve ever played, but falls short for the dumbest of reasons that indicate – yet again – a developer did a piss poor job of seeing if their game was actually fun to play. → Four out of five dentists recommend reading more.
Lamecast #6 – They covered all the ground until it was black
In this, our sixth lamecast, Alexis wants to be a fat princess but doesn’t want to do it online, Casey rediscovers his tits, Don has difficulty with the day/night cycle and Christian agrees. YES!
Video Game Proficiency Test
Video Game Proficiency Test
Examination for Players
For the Following Qualifications:
Hardcore Player status, Bragging Rights.
Time Allowed: 13 minutes, 37 seconds
©1776Videolamer
TURN OVER PAPER TO BEGIN
ANSWER ALL FIVE QUESTIONS:
QUESTION 1.
Below is a table of character match ups for the popular fighting game Street Fighter IV.
1a). Assuming two players of equal skill are playing each other. Player 1 chooses Ken. Player 2 chooses Ryu. What are the chances of player 2 winning three fights in a row?
1b). Player 3 is a veteran of this game series and is the world’s number 4 player. Her proficiency is such that she wins fights with any character at twice the normal predicted chance. → OutRun 2006: Post to Post
Review – Baroque
Baroque has been wronged. There is no other way to put it.
I held off on getting this game until fairly recently, when I saw it for sale at $20. I wasn’t willing to buy it at $50 because I had heard all about how terrible the game was; crippling difficulty, a complete lack of story, no carjackings or Nazis, and so on.
A few months ago, RPGamer ranked it as the best Wii RPG of 2008. Granted, I don’t always agree with RPGamer – but then, I like Opoona, so my tastes are already pretty weird. Plus, look at the competition. Tales of Symphonia 2, Opoona, maybe a couple others. None would rank best RPG of the whatever on any other system. → Now bear my arctic post.
Breaking News – Capcom haven’t announced another Resident Evil remake
Consoles have come and gone, hardware market leaders have become laughing stocks and whole game series have gone from groundbreaking innovation to tired old rehash. Yet one thing has always remained constant in modern gaming: Capcom will remake the original Resident Evil. However, today no reports have come from Capcom on any kind of planned remake causing some to speculate that there won’t be one for up to quite a while.
In 1996 Resident Evil was released on the Sony PlayStation to widespread acclaim and simultaneously gave birth to the survival horror genre (paradoxically, before the earlier released Alone In the Dark). The game then went from strength to strength: with a director’s cut for the PS and a port to the Saturn and the PC in 1997. → Go ahead, read my day.
Pokémon- Literally cannot catch them all
An open letter to Nintendo:
Dear Nintendo (umm Pokémon division?)
My friend and I are Pokémon fans, Pokéfans if you will. Adult Pokémon fans. Is there a sadder thing? Probably. People who are into team sports. All those people who invested their money in property instead of your series of children’s videogames (at least I still have my Marshstomp hah!). But we’re not going to make any excuses for our sad sorry selves. Not to you. Of course we could argue that the whole series should be championed by gamers for it’s visionary approach to RPGs and the ability to take your favourite characters into games that span a number of console generations. For fellow RPG fans how nice would it be to be able to keep transferring your favourite characters from one game to the next without having to start over from scratch? → What is word? Baby don’t read me.