posts by jay
jay

Bad Reviews

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I have read a lot of bad reviews, and not just on this site. There are things I feel should be mandatory in a good review besides just a breakdown of graphics, audio, gameplay and control. At worst, a review is nothing but three 80 word blurbs, half of each spent on being “funny” or about 300 words and then some pictures representing the reviewers feelings of the game, we in the biz call them emoticons.

Tell us who made the game. Mario Golf was not made by Nintendo, nor was Paper Mario. I cannot tell if this is due to a lack of research or if reviewers just think we don’t need to know. I guess their logic is that telling us Nintendo made a game is easier than telling us Camelot did. →  Some say the world will end in fire, some say in read more

The state of videogame movies

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Uwe Boll has done it again with BloodRayne. Not since the blockbuster Alone in the Dark has a movie kept me so close to peeing in my pants at its sheer awesomeness. German superstar Boll shows promise of becoming the next Hitchcock, but don’t be surprised if in 50 years comparing the two directors is a major insult to Boll.

Those who question Majesco’s motives for licensing the BloodRayne property have been silenced. They clearly did not just sell their IP to anyone who would pay any amount of money for it. Majesco saw the same blinding aura of talent we all see in Boll and placed their faith in him accordingly. The company put the respectability of their character on the line for this movie and it paid off in a big way (the movie is almost as sophisticated as BloodRayne’s nude shots in Playboy). →  Contains 10% more consonants than comparable articles.

The Year in Review Reviewed

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When I conceived this site I already knew I wanted it to be not just about games, but about the industry and game media. Actually, those high ideas came after my initial idea of, “If I have a site I’ll get rich, famous, and have 12 wives without becoming a Mormon.” But the thing about the different parts of gaming came soon after. To the cynic, which you should be unless you’re one of those brain-dead optimistic people, an article reviewing other websites material is simply a desperate gesture by a bottom feeder. I assure you that while this is true, I really am dedicated to the idea of reporting on reporting. So look forward to more articles on magazines and other sites (or just read other magazines or sites, they’re far better). →  Call me game-shmael.

A New Years Resolution

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I hope everyone is enjoying their holiday, unless you don’t have any this time of year, in which case I suggest you get a better religion (preferably one that focuses on candles, bunnies, or gifts). I had an excellent vacation in NY with my family and friends and got to participate (or instigate) many video game related activities. I picked up Zelda Four Swords while doing some last minute gift shopping, forced Pat to play Fire Emblem in the terrible traffic on the ride home, then made our way through the Final Fantasy 12 demo (neither of us were impressed), spent an hour or two playing Metropolismania then got to 4 Swords. I also convinced my brother and brother in law to play Guitar Hero and got my brother’s girlfriend hooked on Wario Ware Twisted. →  Game is dead. Game remains dead. And we have killed it.

Small big improvements

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There are a number of small and debatably inconsequential flaws that reoccur in game after game. Always ready to take up unnecessary arms, I have outlined a few of these problems. Each genre has its own issues, but I’ll be looking at things that can generally be found in RPGs. Immersion is important in all games, but particularly necessary in a good RPG. These complaints all revolve around enhancing immersion without significantly changing the game design.

No matter how far storylines advance, most games have merchants that have exactly one thing to say to the player. This flaw makes sure the player is reminded that he is not actually taking part in a living environment, but rather a cold and hardwired video game. →  SNK Article Classics Vol. 1

Am I a jerk?

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Am I a jerk for not being excited by the new XBox?

Am I no fun because I’m waiting for more than a game I want to play before spending $400?

Am I ignorant for not noticing anything new yet besides the graphics?

Am I a bad gamer for not getting into the hype of a new generation of systems?

Am I unpatriotic because I dislike rampant consumerism that drives us to spend hundreds of dollars for a better looking football game?

Am I a technophobe because I wish the current generation would last longer?

Am I an idealist for thinking we could still do so much with this hardware?

Am I a cynic for thinking new consoles are pushed on us so we need to keep spending hundreds of dollars? →  READ3R

Review – Wario Ware, Inc.

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Wario Ware, Inc.
Developed by Nintendo and Intelligent Systems
Published by Nintendo
Released 10.17.03

Nintendo gets a bad rap (from normal people, not losers like me). They practically invented the platform game, brought video games back after the crash of the early 80’s, showed us how a 3D platformer should look, perfected the action RPG, pioneered handheld gaming and released a headset game system after even Sega pulled the plug on their Virtual (or should I say Virtua) Reality system (although not doing what Sega does is generally good business practice). Well add another accomplishment to Nintendo’s long list, because Wario Ware Inc is incredibly different.

The Daddy Mac will make you…

Most games made up of minigames are crappy, but if the games are good enough then the game as a whole can be excellent, like Pirates! →  Now with fewer vowels.

Testers Wanted

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I have seen very little sunlight over the past few days because of a game called Civilization 4. It’s still unclear whether it is an improvement for the series or if it beats the almighty Alpha Centuari, but it is damned good fun and super addictive. Because I NEED to keep playing, its technical flaws really get under my skin. I’m not talking about lacking textures, low polygon counts or jagged edges. The Play disc being mislabeled is just a hint of the upcoming misery that many gamers have suffered through to get their Civ fix.

My computer is above the minimum requirements, yet there is still a massive slowdown with the graphics set to the lowest level. Sometimes the game stalls for a solid 2 or 3 minutes. →  Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty article.

Working Designs meets their Designer

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“First of all, sorry for being incommunicado for such a long time. It’s been a busy time, as you’ll see.

There’s no easy way to say it, so I just will. Working Designs is gone. All the staff has been laid off and the office is closed and has been for some time. Yes, the website is still here, and I am going to do my best to keep it tucked away somewhere on the ‘net so it doesn’t become an illicit domain. (Of course, some of the haters may be of the mind that it’s been illicit all along, heh!).

The most frustrating part of all of this is that I know that our fanbase is still there. Growlanser Generations sold well, but of course not better than it would have sold as two separate titles.

 →  NiGHTS into REaDS

Review – Fire Emblem: Sacred Stones

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Fire Emblem: Sacred Stones
Developed by Intelligent Systems
Published by Nintendo
Released 5.23.05

As a kid fighting in the trenches during the Sega vs. Nintendo War, Shining Force was a potent weapon for the Sega legions. The only possible counter attack was mention Nintendo’s Fire Emblem, Japan’s first console strategy RPG. How I hated this series that I had never even seen. I took solace in knowing that only the most obsessed gamers knew of its existence; I did my best to block the name Fire Emblem from my mind.

Extra vowels make common names mysterious and fanciful.

Thank god that war is over. Having embraced all that video games have to offer, I can now play and love quality titles from all developers. →  May God smite me if I stop reading here!