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EDGE lists Top 100 Games, Internet explodes

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God I hate these Top 100 Lists. Not because they number the games wrong, or omit key games, but of the inevitable backlash they endure from our happy and always intelligent flock, the Internet. Some were so mad that they got pissed off at the site they read the list on, even when it wasn’t originally written by that specific site.

If you’re man enough to go through every single game and not have some derogative comment after, then I will let you view the winners, courtesy of Next-Gen.biz.

As I went through the list, I started to see what they were trying to do. You’ll see that EDGE included Super Mario World as the sole 2D Mario platformer. Surprisingly, Super Mario Bros 1. and 3 did not make the list. →  Read the rest

Morning Glory Issue 002

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panhunt

After the BBFC declared that Manhunt 2 would never be released in its current state, or indeed without “significant changes”, Rockstar have decided to go back to the drawing board with Manhunt. Or is that the kitchen chopping board?

In an unprecedented move, Rockstar have today announced that Manhunt 2 will not be released, but there is good news — Panhunt will be released in its place.

Panhunt will follow the misadventures of Head Chef Billy Chopsticks as he goes about his daily business of cooking meals for his doting public. In typical videogame style, the beginning of Panhunt sees Billy losing everything he owned — his world-renowned restaurant, his gorgeous wife, and most crucially — his razor sharp cutting implements.

But, Rockstar have said, this won’t be a typical case of rags to riches, rather a case of “rags to prettier rags”. →  Read the rest

Morning Glory Issue 001

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In this first ever issue of Morning Glory, we see the typical setting of two gamers talking. One day we might see three gamers talking, or even four. This morning only required two though, so only two there are. Bring forth gamers one and two.
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It’s the typical setting of a conversation. There are two people. One fellow clearly favours the food, whilst the other obviously doesn’t favour it as much.

Porky decides it’s his turn to start off a deep and meaningful conversation. His expression suddenly turns sullen, and he takes in a deep breath.

“Hey man.”

“Hey.”

Porky fucks up starting a deep and meaningful conversation. Nevertheless, he ploughs on with vigour. He takes another deep breath, as if launching into a long speech.

“Have you heard about Manhunt 2 being banned in Europe? →  Read the rest

Nintendo confirms WiiWare: Indie Gaming on Wii

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This week Nintendo sent the word out that they are indeed working on a Wii channel where users can download original games, titled WiiWare. This is basically Nintendo’s version of Xbox Live Arcade.

Nintendo is working on getting indie devs to take advantage of the WiiWare channel, but it’s still unknown how developers can actually make a game on the system without open source API’s for the Wii’s architecture. It seems that indie devs may need to pony up the cash for a real dev kit. Thankfully, Wii dev kits are pretty damn cheap right now, estimated at a paltry $2000.

Now I’m sure most of you are thinking, “Yeah, Nintendo said this when they first announced the Wii and it’s online services.” You’d be right, but you must remember Nintendo rarely comes through with some of their really inventive ideas. →  Read the rest

Lumines sells like hotcakes. No, the original one. Yeah.

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See, I told you guys the PSP wasn’t dead. This week, Lumines, the damn-near-perfect musical puzzler for the PSP, saw a 5900% rise in sales on Amazon. And all because of a bug. Yes, Lumines is probably the first game in history to become more sought-after because of a minor bug that not even QA’ers can find. Yes, you’ve entered Bizarro World. Welcome.

Over the weekend, PSP homebrew programmers/hackers found an exploit in Q! Entertainment’s puzzler in the form of a buffer overflow. Basically, this allows anyone to run unsigned code on the PSP, which Sony’s been desperately trying to stop. Ya know, so they can actually make money on the thing.

And of course, the underground homebrew scene has already released a downgrader app to bring the PSP’s firmware version back to the coveted 1.50 release. →  Read the rest

Which controller has/had the best D-Pad?

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I would try to answer this question, but there’s no way in Hell I’d do it justice. I’ve used a lot of different controllers in my life, but as I’ve learned in the past, there are still a lot of them, on home consoles and handheld, that I’ve never even heard of, hiding in the shadows of gaming history. I mean, wtf is a Nuon?

So if I tried to answer the question of “Which controller has/had the best D-Pad?” I’m sure I’d skip over one of them that may deserve the coveted award more.

So I leave this up to you, my fellow readers. In your gaming trails, which console was/is home to the greatest D-Pad ever?

For me, and I know I’m gonna get burned for this one, I gotta give it up for the PSP’s d-pad. →  Read the rest

Playing catch up: Chrono Trigger

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I finally finished Chrono Trigger, and only 12 years late. Not too bad. Much like Super Mario World, this is another classic that deserves the accolades it has received. I only hope Link to the Past and Final Fantasy 4 are Chrono Trigger good. Though because of the game’s quality characterization, I am now slightly depressed.

It has been pretty uncommon in my life, but now and then a game comes along that affects me like a great movie or novel does. Now that there is no more to see, what happens to the characters? Crono, whose name is a typo because of the apparent five character limit in the game, was the standard silent protagonist and I don’t give a damn about him. But Frog, Magus, Lucca and Robo I do care about. →  Read the rest

UK Says HELL No to Manhunt 2

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Just as we start to think that everything has settled down in England with all that rubbish about games causing deaths (even though we all know that it’s over-sized hot dogs that kill the majority of the human population), ELSPA decide it’s time to find a new scandal — Manhunt 2.

It was obviously going to kick up a fuss. The first game did. But it does carry (or it would have done) an adult rating and only adults are allowed to play it, so what’s the problem? Worst part about it is that ELSPA forgot to tell Rockstar first, preferring to let them read it in the British press first.

Conveniently, MCV posed an interesting question this week regarding this very issue. What if Rockstar would have made Silent Hill? →  Read the rest

Sony decides PS3 is making a comeback

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Offering no sales figures or other sales facts, Sony CEO declared, “All the production problems have been solved. We are making a comeback already.” It seems Sony has figured out how important image is and so they’ve decided to take it upon themselves to tell the media what their image is. It would not be at all shocking if the PS3 begins to make a comeback only because an article has printed that it is making a comeback. Microsoft should try this tactic with the Zune.

In other breaking news, videolamer’s popularity is growing beyond all expectations.

Gamefly says NO to Adult Only games

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Gamefly refuses to carry Manhunt 2 if its Adults Only rating sticks. Anyone who is a Gamefly member must be at least 18 years of age and have a credit card. This means Gamefly is telling its adult customers that they should not be playing adult games. Fuck Gamefly, I’m glad I don’t use their service.

Though not an exact fit, this letter I wrote to Wal-Mart regarding the Hot Coffee scandal is still apropos:

“Thank you for being a family friendly store. Capitalism will never work if we just allow people to buy whatever they want. We need more huge corporations to stand up to products Jesus wouldn’t like and say, ‘No. Our customers do not want this.’ Freedom of choice is just a euphemism for evil and I applaud you in your efforts to cut down on evil. →  Read the rest

Breaking News: Big Japanese publisher to release crappy games on Wii

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According to Screen Digest, one major Japanese third party publisher said, “We’re running a business, not to win awards but to make money — if we make breakeven plus on Wii then we are happy.” This translates to “We will port a lot of PS2 games to the Wii and develop real games for other consoles. The neutrality of Screen Digest has been disputed on some popular gaming forums, but assuming this quote is accurate, it still boggles my mind.

I was an economics minor and want to pretend my parents 120k were well spent, so please roll with this haphazard attempt at a proof:

First, we must necessarily assume that profit comes first because the quote indicates this is true. This rules out the idea that 3rd party publishers are saving their big games for HD and fancy processors simply because the developers want to work on them. →  Read the rest

Geometry Wars (PC) Thoughts

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Earlier this week, the premier downloadable-content service, Steam, released Bizarre Creations’ Xbox Live Arcade darling, Geometry Wars for all of its PC users. If you’ve never had the chance to play this old-school romp, then I suggest you go now and click the Buy button. For $2.50 (until Friday), you can’t afford NOT to buy it.

Being a fan of the Xbox 360 original, I wanted to give my short impressions. Basically, you get what’s already on the 360 platform. An extremely hard old-school shooter that has an amazing style. Just make sure to bring your extra large balls to this affair, my dear readers. Geo Wars is not for the faint of heart.

But I wanted to focus on something else for this post. In the PC version, the online Leaderboards are not included. →  Read the rest

Der Langrisser: Finally translated

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Lester shows Cherie what’s for.

When you hear “Langrisser”, you probably think of nothing at all unless you pay attention to Japanese-language games. Thanks to a small, talented, and dedicated group of translators, that is about to change. A group led by Derrick Sobodash has completely translated the Super Famicom game “Der Langrisser” into English.

First off: Der Langrisser is actually a remake of Langrisser 2. Why should we care? If you ever tried a little-known Strategy RPG for Genesis by the name of Warsong, you have played the first game in the Langrisser series.

Warsong is a tour de force of strategy, and could have been the start of a trend toward larger-scale SRPG battles. Unfortunately, Career Soft was the only company who maintained the trend with their Langrisser games, ending with the fifth entry (for Saturn and PSX). →  Read the rest

Rwise fwum my gwave!

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Hi folks, its me again. I know I’ve been absent for a little while (a week’s time on the ‘net is an eternity), but I’m posting to let you know I haven’t left. Last week I started an adventure that had me going to Maryland and looking for work.

Suffice to say it worked, and come 2-3 weeks from now I’ll have a place to stay and a full time job (the latter of which is already taken care of). Once that’s over, expect me to return with plenty of articles harassing the industry, myself, and you.

PS – I beat Gears of War. It got better as it went along!

Playing catch up: Super Mario World

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I was a Sega kid. This means different things to different people — I was deluded, I had bad taste, or maybe I loved action games? Yes, somewhat and no. Sega’s consoles gave me plenty of great games to play growing up, and I don’t regret knowing the Phantasy Star and Shining Force series as well as other gamers know the Final Fantasy and Dragon Quest series.

What I do regret is how little I know about the Final Fantasy and Dragon Quest series. Everything in life costs something, even if only time, and playing so many Sega games necessarily meant I had little opportunity for Nintendo games.

Here is a partial, embarrassing list of titles I missed that I still hope to play:

Any Final Fantasy before 6
Any Dragon Quest before 7 and after 1
Link to the Past
Chrono Trigger
Metroid
Super Metroid
Ocarina of Time
Super Mario World

Before yesterday, I had never played Super Mario World. →  Read the rest

Rumor-ium: Wii killed the hardcore gamer… star.

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There’s a new rumor running around the neighbor-net (which I sincerely hope is false) that says Nintendo’s Project H.A.M.M.E.R., the action title for the Wii, has been canceled.

And if that’s not bad enough, the main reason it was supposedly canceled was because Nintendo wants NST (Nintendo Software Technology) to develop “expanded audience” titles instead. And by that I’m sure they mean casual games geared towards non-gamers.

Dear God no.

In recent months, many people were worried that, with games like Nintendogs and Brain Age becoming amazingly huge hits, that the hardcore gaming sector would take a huge hit. I never thought it was ever really going to happen, as there are still a lot of games geared towards true gamers coming out in the next year or so, but this rumor has me worried. →  Read the rest

Suck It, 3D Realms

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Skesis Nukem

I have been very tight lipped about the Duke Nukem Forever situation. I have been for a decade. When speaking of the project I have only ever defended the guys at 3D Realms. Making a game can’t possibly be an easy undertaking, especially a game established in success, steeped in expectation and absolutely festooned with the hopes and dreams of thousands of loyal fans.

My only real expectation has been that they release a good game that they have packed full of a love of the franchise and dripping with Duke Nukem goodness. Just as Duke Nukem 3D was the obvious evolution of the Duke Nukem platformers, so too should DNF be the obvious evolution of D3D.

At every engine change or design reboot or announcement that it was just a few months away those associates of mine who had already given up the ghost, their collective DNF will depleted, would chatter like the Skeksis at feast about the turgid state of the development process, its distention fueling rage. →  Read the rest

Little things that make a big difference: Visible enemies in RPGs

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Playing Chrono Trigger today, I noticed what a nice change of pace being able to see enemies on the screen was. The Saga games may be another RPG that shows bad guys, but that series does it in a way that makes wandering maps akin to a running play in 10 Yard Fight. Chrono’s enemies are different.

Sure, you can avoid many of them, but the little animation they run through pre-battle goes a long way to immerse us in their world. These aren’t invisible baddies who materialize randomly – they’re always out there, even if they’re hiding in the bushes.

Shining the Holy Ark modified this concept of stumbling upon villains in their native environment. Enemies don’t frolic like they do in Chrono Trigger, but rather make an entrance unto the battlefield worthy of a celebrity. →  Read the rest

Face it: Gears of War sucked

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I’m sorry my fellow videolamerians, but I’m gonna be the first one to say that Gears of War was a big disappointment. After going through the game twice, I can safely say I will never play that game ever again. I traded it in, got $20 for it, and picked up Condemned: Criminal Origins with my winnings. And amazing as this may sound, I’m having a far more enjoyable time with C:CO than I ever did with Gears.

I know, it sounds like complete blasphemy what I just said. But let me explain my heresy before you stick that spike up my pooper.

Gears of War seemed to cater to the more hardcore shooter fans, and while I do like those kinds of games, I was hoping to see a little more innovation. →  Read the rest

Make my RPG

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The RPG Maker XP community can be harsh. Members tend to look down on any game developed using RPG Maker XP that contains the default graphics and music. Not wanting to play a 50th game that uses the exact same character graphics and boss music makes sense.

But then there don’t seem to be 50 finished games. Much of the community expertly ignores a new game if it looks old hat, but games rarely see completion. It doesn’t make much sense why people are so sick of character art they have only seen used in five finished titles, but not wanting to use that character art in their own games is what leads to so few finished products.

I’m afraid their way of thinking is affecting me, too. My RPG Maker game was supposed to be small and contain no original assets. →  Read the rest