New Jersey

Teabagging and Halo 3 — An Anthropological Study

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The Muffin Buffalo stalks through the corridors and crevasses of The Narrows map on Halo 3. Quietly he roams, picking his targets and releasing them from their mortal coils. He has done this many times before and is good at his job. Out of nowhere, a fellow warrior named SheepandVelcro69 jabs Muffin Buffalo from behind with the butt of his shotgun. Muffin Buffalo lurches forward and then lifelessly drops to the ground. This has also happened to him many times, business as usual, the cycle of death repeats.

But wait, SheepandVelcro69 is not leaving his corpse; does he feel remorse for the act he has just committed? Is he taking a moment of silent reflection to realize that body could just as easily be him lying on the ground? No, our shotgun equipped friend creeps up to Muffin Buffalo’s head, centers himself above the corpse’s cranium and proceeds to drop his crotch up and down on the motionless clump of pixels . →  Read the rest

Review – Onimusha Warlords

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Back where my folks live in Pennsylvania, local cable picks up Channel 63 of New Jersey. Despite being a local, American owned station, Channel 63 fills all of its time slots with shows and commercials from Japan and Korea. This, of course, means that at any given hour you can find all kinds of ridiculous Samurai drama.

These shows are always the same; the men are loud and gruff, the women soft and gentle. The costumes are cheap, flamboyant, or in the case in which a demon is present, both (this is most of the time). The plots are ridiculous, with characters running around in the most awkward and confused ways regardless of what is going on. And every episode of Samurai drama ends with coming attractions that are preceded by bold blocks of kanji with flames in the background. →  Read the rest