Micro Madness

GB Micro
Exact size.

The Game Boy Micro is stupid and anyone who denies it is a biased fanboy (as opposed to the more objective fanboy) or a Nintendo employee. The first problem a consumer will notice is the systems price. A hundred bucks for something you probably already have a different version of?

The next obvious problem is the tiny screen. I already have trouble playing action games on my GBA-SP because the screen isn’t very big. The tiny screen is a part of the overall tiny system. This is the major selling point but it’s also one of the best reasons not to buy one. The GBA-SP already hurts my hands. If the SP is designed for Japanese fingers then the Micro is design for Japanese ants’ fingers.

Then there is the competition. If you have the money, just get an SP. It plays more games (original GB and GB Color games, the Micro only plays Advance games), will be easier on your eyes and won’t cause the carpel tunnel to flare up as badly. Or just save 30 more dollars and buy a DS. It has a bigger screen(s) and plays new games and Advance games and unlike the Micro, will have a stream of top rate titles for years to come.

People at E3
I played the Micro at E3 (I’m the chick on the left).

So who is the Micro for? I can only think of two demographics, and I try to avoid both: the rich and the style conscious, who are often one in the same. If you own a DS and an SP and every game you want then buy the Micro. I can’t stop you and I’ll probably end up pumping gas for you one day. I apologize if I’ve offended you, your majesty. If you’re some German nihilist dressed in all black (it may be apparent I am not up to date on fashion) and need the Micro to look cool, then fine. Buy a bunch of stupid faceplates for it because it really matters and is a wise place to spend your money. Anyone else who buys a Micro should be slapped.

The Micro is really for Nintendo. They want to make more money off the same system yet again. Why does a company who says it’s all about innovation release the same hardware and Pokemon game over and over? Maybe it’s a necessary evil if they want to fund their innovations. If the Revolution is as amazing as the Virtual Boy, they will need all the money they can get from the Super Color Game Boy Micro SPDS Pocket.

As for the DS, it’s a system I plan on getting but there will be at least one more version released in the near future. The way Nintendo milks their best fans, you’d think the company was entirely supported by 200 people… who are cows… nevermind.

 Boys through the years
Lineage of the Game Boy

Game Boy – 1989
Game Boy

Game Boy Pocket – 1996

Game Boy Color – 1998

Game Boy Advance – 2001

GBA SP – 2003

GBA Micro – 2005

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